Reality TV/reality sex-tape star Tommy Lee has a new exciting role… In a reality TV show. News reports are saying Tommy Lee is fulfilling his life-long dream of portraying Nancy Drew on camera, in a new series that “attempts to uncover various rituals, symbols, and other mysteries of secret societies.”
“This is the first show that I’ve been a part of that will blow our minds and reveal things that will explain almost all our questions.” -Lee
As opposed to what? The previous shows that only answered some of our questions? Okay, so Lee must have answered questions like “Is there a god?,” and “What’s the purpose of life?,” so we’re left with the more important shit like:
- How come you are still around?
- How come you got famous in the first place?
- Did you ever faint after getting a boner? I imagine your cock sucks up half of your blood.