Author Archives: Alex

Mike Portnoy talks about 9/11

Mike Portnoy is a man of many talents. He plays drums, he plays.. Well, that’s it, really. So maybe I’m exaggerating, but still, check out what he has to say about September 11. You know, cause September 11 is right around the corner, and it will be its 10th anniversary, so we just have to hear what ever goddamn musician has to say about that tragedy.

“Dream Theater was working in NYC at the time mixing our album ‘Six Degrees of Inner Turbulence’ and I would’ve been driving in that afternoon for our session. But as the events of the morning unfolded, I found myself glued to the TV in disbelief as to what I was witnessing. It was all too surreal. I felt like I was watching a Will Smith Hollywood film. It couldn’t possibly be really happening.“

Read full interview here.

Woah, racist alert. So no matter what, if a building is up in flames, a black man has to be behind it, even if that black man happens to be an A-list movie star. Wow. I am speechless, Mike. Really?

I keed, I keed, he’s obviously referencing either ‘Independence Day,’ a movie about spaceships destroying major cities (which ironically is more believable than some of the 9/11 conspiracies, but let’s not go there… yet), or ‘Wild Wild West,’ such a huge bomb of a movie, it could literally take a few buildings down.

On the reals though, I know 9/11 is nothing to laugh at, but neither is South Park. Yet millions of people laugh at that crap show all the time…

But seriously,  I hope I haven’t offended anyone. We get a lot of traffic from New York so, in case you were offended, I sincerely apologize on behalf of my sober self.

Name-dropping Metallica makes headlines. Case in point

Jeff Waters of Annihilator decided to shed some light on a rumor no one even heard of. What rumor, you ask? About Metallica changing the name of their song to “Enter Sandman” after “Never, Neverland” was already taken by them.

I use the term ‘shed a light’ loosely, because he has no idea if the rumor is true or not. So all he does is tell the rumor one more time. Great, that will help. On with more interesting stories, Mr. Waters.

Rumor has it that I have an abnormally big schlong. Wonder why that rumor never makes it in the media. Maybe I also need to name-drop a few big bands, just to get the e-press going.

I will not write an ‘off to never, neverland’ joke. I will not write an ‘off to never, neverland’ joke. I will not write an ‘off to never, neverland’ joke. I will not write an ‘off to never, neverland’ joke. I will not write an ‘off to never, neverland’ joke.

The Big Four Guitar World cover is here

The Big Four are featured in a Guitar World issue and we got the cover exclusively! If by ‘exclusively’ you mean ‘stolen from Blabbermouth.’ The cover is after the jump, and by the looks of it, the magazine itself features a poster of Dave and Jaymz fist-bumping each other. Sounds awesome, too bad this isn’t 1985.

Anyway, the site Glenrock Patch conducted an interview with Scott Ian, Tom Araya and David Ellefson about The Big Four and you guessed it, same type of questions, same type of answers. Read the predictable article here.

If you’re going to the NY Big Four show, we’re hosting a party on Skype for you guys, we can all like, videochat and drink beer together!!! [/lies]

Daily Dose Of Metal: Dream Theater

Since we posted about Mike Portnoy and Dream Theater below, figured I would treat you guys to a live clip of them playing ‘Under A Glass Moon’ together. I really like the song, and it gets me nostalgic goosebumps when I listen to it.

The solo is amazing. A bit too much whammy, but hey, it’s lovely.

Let’s talk about Mike Portnoy

Former Dream Theater drummer Mike Portnoy thinks he will rejoin his former band sometime. Wishful thinking ftmfw.

“I never say never. They’ve moved on and I’ve moved on. Mike Mangini’s an amazing drummer. But if the opportunity presented itself a few years down the road and I was available, I would definitely consider it. That band was my heart and soul for 25 years. There’s too much history there to ignore.“

Read full interview here.

At least he has nice things to say about his replacement. I never understood why musicians were mad at the guys that replaced them. It’s like being mad at your former lover’s new boyfriend. If you split up before they met, why would you hate him? Just hate her.

I’m full of life lessons, should you need some.

Anyway, back to this Dream Theater shit. I appreciate Mike’s kind words to Mike ver 2.0, but I still think his optimism is funny. Especially since this is what Jordan Rudess had to say about him:

“But the bottom line is, when Mike left, it left four guys there — four all very capable, qualified musical people — that weren’t really at the true capacity of what we all could do. Because Mike was a very controlling person in his role in the band. So it wasn’t so much about us not being able to do something; it was about the way that the positioning of the band, it was just going in a certain way, and now that we’re in this other phase, we’re just excited because we get to pretty much continuing writing music the way we were, but we get to kind of say, ‘OK, we’re moving on, we’re gonna do our thing and write the music.’“

Read full article here.

Whoops. Tough luck Mike, looks like the band is just ready to move on and is feeling great.

Exit optimism. Enter realism.

God, I write the dumbest fucking lines ever. Shit.