Author Archives: Alex

Video of the week: Megadeth

Hello me, meet the real me. And one of my favorite Megadeth songs.

Both me and the real me have a problem though. We don’t really get what this song is really about. Is it about war? Is it about mental illness? Is it about the TSA? The lyrics are so ambiguous that it’s hard to put a finger on what Dave Mustaine is really saying… Either that or I’m stupid. I’d say it’s about war, but you can really argue that it’s about something else entirely. I guess we’ll never know.

But the video is pretty unintentionally funny. Dave’s facial expressions and the way he interacts with himself seem straight out of a SNL skit. A bit too much comedy for such a serious message… Or maybe he’s pulling a reverse Kubrick by using a serious song over comical footage? You just never know with this guy…

What I do know is that Dimebag invented a drink after this song. If you didn’t know that, you obviously haven’t seen Pantera’s home videos. If so, leave this site and don’t come back until you do, metal traitor.

The Golden Gods Awards trailer is here

I don’t know about you guys, but I don’t trust any award ceremony where they honor Gods and I’m not nominated. So don’t hold it against me if I’m not extremely excited for this ceremony.

But its trailer has hit the net (as seen above) and it does feature a Pantera song so how bad can it be? Well, let’s put it this way… Avenged Sevenfold seems like the big winner of the evening.

By the way, this already happened last month, but it’s gonna be aired more than a month later because, why would you need to show it as it happens? It’s just an award ceremony, it’s not like anyone will post the awards rendering the whole night useless as the ‘excitement factor’ disappears. Get real, yo.

Make the jump for a list of what will happen so that you don’t have to actually watch it.

Get ready for the Kiss Kruise. Yes, really.

It may come as a surprise to you, but Kiss like money. They’ve sold everything from drinks, condoms, gnomes, etc… But if you’re anything like me, you’re probably thinking “Well, they haven’t made their own cruise yet!”

Boy, are you in luck:

“The first-ever Kiss Kruise: Wet, Wild & Rockin’ is setting sail October 13-17, 2011 from Miami, Florida to Half Moon Cay and Nassau, Bahamas on board the Carnival Destiny. KISS and Sixthman are joining forces to create the wettest, wildest, most rockin’ cruise in the Atlantic.

Kiss will be hosting this ship to bring you music, krazy onboard activities, and Kiss-themed nights.“

Read full article here.

Blabbermouth is so excited about this that they wrote the ‘krazy onboard activities’ line twice in their article. They seem pretty calm usually, but if this got them amped up then boy, it must be good. I guess I’ll start throwing money Kiss’ way now and join this thing.

I’ve avoided Kiss’ music in a lot of places… Bars… Festivals… YouTube… I’ve never avoided it on a boat, so this should be fun.

Steven Tyler denies having a large penis

Oh boy, here we go…

So, Steven Adler told a story about walking in on Steven Tyler screwing four women, and described his penis as being ‘the biggest in rock ‘n’ roll.’ In anyone’s book, that’s a huge compliment. Someone’s a witness to your incredible sexual feat AND is testifying about the size of your manhood. Where do I sign up for such press?

Don’t get me wrong, Tyler, but an eyewitness to your being heterosexual is something to cherish when you wear tight leather pants and makeup. I’m just saying.

So being the sexually secure guy that he is, Steven Tyler denied the claims. Yes, really.

“First of all, I’ve never been with a guy when I’ve been with three or four women. I just don’t swing that way; I’m sorry. Thank god I got sober. I might have wound up… Who knows?! I wasn’t that promiscuous, let’s just say. [Adler] was dreaming about my schlong.“

Read full article here.

I don’t know what’s sadder, Adler feeling the need to talk about Tyler’s ‘big penis,’ Tyler denying it, or me writing about it… Either way, there goes my credibility with the ladies. The fact that I’m ‘blogging’ wasn’t chasing chicks away fast enough, I had to write penis articles to make them run even faster.

🙁

Def Leppard do Leno

Def Leppard have single-handedly (literally) performed on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno. I really don’t know what else to say, just wanted to make that joke.

You can find the show here if NBC.com is kind enough to stream it in your country. You can find Google here if you want to look up how awesome I am.