Category Archives: News
Ian out, Kisser in
Sepultura’s Andreas Kisser, you know the guy who can’t make up his mind, will be replacing Scott Ian for eight Anthrax shows in July.
Why? Because Scott Ian and his wife, Meat Loaf’s daughter Pearl Aday, are expecting their first baby. As a representative of Dose of Metal, I want to congratulate Ian’s sperm.
No Kiss for two
I’ll be honest with you. I think Kiss look like a bunch of transvestites and all they do is play shitty pop music and nothing about them is shocking at all. To me, these guys play in the same league as Bon Jovi. I hate both of these bands.
But on to the news. Paul Stanley, the guy with the Peggy Bundy haircut, the star around the eye and the red lipstick said the following about a reunion of the original Kiss line-up in a recent interview:
“The word that comes up is ‘closure.’ We had a good time that deteriorated over time. When we did the farewell tour I realized I didn’t want to say farewell to KISS, I wanted to say farewell to two of the members.”
Now, I know that Paul Stanley and Gene Simmons are in the band but that’s it. I also know that they had like 20,000 other bandmembers but I don’t know any of them by name. So, if you’re a Kiss fan, I have some advices for you: #1 Start listening to better music, #2 Stop painting your face, you look like a woman, #3 Use Wikipedia to research who Stanley was talking about.
Nightrage to enter studio
Nightrage, the band that sounds like At The Gates, smells like At The Gates, probably even tastes like At The Gates, and even had At The Gates vocalist Tomas Lindberg up until their second or third album, are set to enter the studio in June to record their forthcoming fifth album, which will probably sound like At The Gates, only not as good.
If you are concerned that I’ll write more sentences that are way way way way too long, then worry not, as I am most sure, that I shall not do that again any time soon, for as long as this post continues. So on with the Nightrage news…
The band have completed work on 15 songs during the pre-production phase for their as-yet-untitled fifth album. The ‘Rage will be recording all drums, bass, and guitars over at Zero Gravity Studios in Athens, Greece. More information can be found over here.
Morbid Angel reveal album details
Death Metal titans, Morbid Angel, have revealed the title of their forthcoming album as Illud Divinum Insanus. Being the complete dummy I am, I have no idea what that means, but I’m going to guess it translates as “Dose of Metal is totally awesome and Mark has a ten inch penis that drives all the women wild.” Just a groundless guess mind…
According to Blabbermouth (guess where I stole found this news from?) Illud Divinum Insanus was recorded at Mana Recording Studios in St. Petersburg, ( in Florida, USA, not Russia silly) with engineer Erik Rutan (ex Morbid Angel guitarist, and producer for bands such as Cannibal Corpse and Goatwhore [he produced my favorite porn flick?]). The new CD will be the band’s first to be recorded without drummer Pedro “Pete” Sandoval, who last year underwent back surgery for a deteriorating disc problem. Currently replacing him on a temporary basis is Tim Yeung, who has previously played with Divine Heresy, All That Remains, and Nile, amongst other bands.
R.I.P. Mike Starr
I wish this was my brutal sense of humor and that I’m just fucking around, but it’s not. Mike Starr, former Alice in Chains bass player, has been found dead in his home in Salt Lake City. He was 44.
Members of Alice in Chains have issued a statement on the loss of their former band-mate, as well as members of Guns N’ Roses, Motley Crue and Dream Theater.
No official statement has been released about the cause of death, though in the light of recent events, we can strongly speculate that it was a drug overdose.
R.I.P.
