Category Archives: News

Gwar zombies

Gwar, apart from being the sound I make after I orgasm, also happens to be the name of a band from Virginia.  I say “band”, but really they’re just some musically challenged guys dressed up as monsters (no, not Lordi).

The frontman, Cuntus Ordasoras (I may have made that up, but his “name” is equally stupid and frankly I can’t be bothered to type it out) has been officially named Honorary Grand Marshal Of TORONTO ZOMBIE WALK, which I believe can be translated as Grand C*nt of Toronto, but I haven’t got my Gwar-English dictionary on me, sorry.

If you care, which you don’t, you can go read the story at Blabbermouth. Frankly, I don’t recommend it though.

All That Remains make music video

All That Remains released a new video, “Hold On,” which you can watch after the jump.

Question is, does it pass the AWESOME TEST I just came up with? Let’s see.

– Paper being blown by wind machine, check.
– Emo dude being emo on a couch, check.
– Random ginger chick in bathroom, check.
– Random smoke blowing out of nowhere, check.
– All of the above happening within the first 10 seconds of the video, check.

100% passed. Congratulations!

Anselmo is a busy man

Philip Anselmo’s 2050th band, Arson Anthem, just put up their whole debut album for streaming on MySpace. It’s called “Insecurity Notoriety” and you can check it out here.

In case you haven’t heard of this band, an interesting thing to note is that Phil’s actually on guitar, while Mike IX Williams of EYEHATEGOD fame is doing the unintelligible screaming singing.

The CD will be released October 12th. Track listing after the jump.

Also worth mentioning is that Down’s “Diary of a Mad Band” CD is available for streaming here. It’s only until Sunday, October 10th, so hurry up, yo.

Bodom guitarist speaks

Children of Bodom’s guitarist, Bodom Child (I made that up, haha, his real name is Roope something), gave an interview recently to the German edition of Metal Hammer. It’s nothing important, really, just details about their new album.

Here’s a statement from the band. I’m gonna make a prediction, they’re excited about it and it’s gonna be perfect.

“We’re very excited to let everyone hear what we’re creating with this new record, everything you love about Children of Bodom has been magnified tenfold and we’re pushing ourselves harder than ever before. Expect nothing less than the perfect storm!“

See? Told you! Video of the interview after the jump.

When asked why Nokia sucks nowadays, Children of Bodom had no comment.

Headlines

Shinedown (pictured above, unfortunately) will release a ‘deluxe edition’ (read: shameless milker) of their 2008 smash non-hit “The Sound Of Madness.” The release date is November 23rd, blah blah, it will have nine bonus songs, blah blah, overall buy it if you want, don’t buy it if you don’t… Who am I to tell you what to do?

Apparently Americans like bands with silly masks, as Mushroomhead’s album is in the U.S. Top 50 chart. Well, at #44, but still, pretty good for some guys who look like the gimp in Pulp Fiction. It sold over 11,000 copies in its first week of release and this begs the question… How come my band ‘Sexy Clowns From Hell’ never got popular? Unfair.

White Wizzard released a song in tribute to the late Ronnie James Dio. Check it out on their MySpace page. It’s called “Shooting Star” and it’s the first song featuring their new vocalist. Sorry, couldn’t be bothered remembering his name 🙁