2,000th post
That’s right, fuckers, this is our 2,000th post. What’s great about it is, this historic milestone in metal blogging coincides with our very own birthday: We’re turning 1 today!
It’s hard to imagine what the world wide web was like before we came along last September, but it was probably the same, just without one more badly-written, pretentious blog that tries to talk about metal.
Anyway, we’re gonna give some free shit for you guys, and we’ll pretty much be inebriated 24/7. Well, we’re always inebriated, so it’s not like this is a special occasion or anything, but just saying.
Since we wrote exactly 2,000 posts in exactly one year, that would mean we average at about 5.4 posts a day. That’s not bad, turn that to inches and it’s my dick size — FROM THE GROUND UP (HAHAH, PRICELESS!!!!111)
So yeah, that’s about all I had to say. Have a great day and thanks for checking this site and helping us get to the number 1 spot on “Best metal blogs of all time!” — It really means a lot that our work has been rewarded with an award, even though we created the award ourselves and self-proclaimed us the winners. It still counts, so thank you!
Expect some cool shit this weekend, and by ‘cool’ I obviously mean ‘mediocre to bad.’
Buh bye, suckaz!
– The illiterate team of writers behind Dose of Metal
Ugly Kid Joe? Oh ugly kid no!
Shannon Larkin has a girl’s name. He also plays drums for Godsmack. And he was/is also in Ugly Kid Joe.
The title to this news post may be the dumbest I’ve written yet (and I’ve done some stupid ones), but if you ever heard of that band, I guess I stole have some good news.
“The rumours are true! Whit, Klaus, Cordell, Dave, and myself got together this year and made six new songs for an EP to put out at some point. We are really stoked at how it came out – pure UKJ dude! We have no label, agent, or management and did the record by ourselves without a real plan other than getting together in a room again after all these years and jamming out! We’ll keep people posted as to when we will release something and perhaps even play some shows if there is interest in us.“
Read full interview here.
Well, isn’t that sweet? I’ve never heard of them, but hey… If they have no plans, tell you what. We’ll handle distribution for them. All we need is a thank you and a check for $1,000,000,000,000,000 and we’ll do business.
%5 discount if they admit we’re awesome in public.
Alex = problem solver.
Morton and Fafara sitting in a tree…
If you like collaborations between great musicians, I got news for you: This piece of news isn’t for you.
For everyone else, check this out. Devildriver singer Dez Fafara and Lamb of God guitarist Mark Morton are joining forces to create a new project.
I know what you’re thinking straight away: “I want to know what bands this project ‘sounds like’!!” — Boy, are you in luck.
According to Fafara, it’s “Circus of Power meets Badmotorfinger-era Soundgarden.”
According to Morton, it’s the band Trouble that is the biggest influence.
When will this be released? No one knows, all we know is there will be 14 tracks. We also know they’re being described as being ‘killer,’ but let’s be honest, they may be biased.
Source: Blabbermouth
We don’t care what musicians think of 9/11
Look, what happened ten years ago on September 11 is no laughing matter. Sure, some jokes have been ‘cracked,’ even by yours truly, but at the end of the day, thousands of people died and many more were injured. Families were broken, careers were destroyed and now airport security has permission to stare at your penis. I mean, it’s fucked up.
But if there’s anything that aggravates me more than a fat, sweaty TSA agent with a double-digit IQ copping a feel on my balls, it’s having to listen to ‘celebrities’ talking about this tragedy (or any other tragedy), as if a tragedy needs to be explained by a bunch of ‘artists’ to be taken seriously.
So in case footage of planes crashing into two of America’s biggest landmarks wasn’t enough for you to take this tragedy seriously, here are a few vids of Corey Taylor, Shannon Larkin and John Maggard ‘remembering’ the attack and where they were when it happened.
Lemme guess what they did. They were going about their days when they suddenly turned on the news and saw the awful footage. Then they were glued to their seats to find out what happens next. Guess what, everyone did that, turns out not only people who get recognized once in a while react that way to a globally televised tragedy.
Here’s an idea… Why not interview the firemen who risked their lives trying to save others? I mean, I know a lot of them have appeared on the news, but not enough as I bet none of you can even name one. Yet a guy who usually wears a mask gets more airtime to talk how he was chillin’ at home and turned on CNN. Life is fair.
Make the jump to see the self-indulgence.
Shit Shatner sings
Yesterday Revolver magazine premiered William Shatner‘s collaboration with Zakk Wylde, cover of Sabbath‘s Iron Man, and since we’ve been too busy being too awesome, we’re posting it today. But hey, it’s never too late to make fun of people, right?
Speaking of which, I’m not going to do it. I mean, it’s obvious as hell he’s either trolling or being super naive. And you know what? It’s the first of those two, which makes you naive for thinking it could be anything else. About the song, you can hear it bellow if you really want to, and see the album cover for Seeking Major Tom (coming out next month) after the jump.
