Watch old people review The Black Dahlia Murder

Every metal site out there already covered this, so why shouldn’t we? Are we not good enough?

Anyway, the video above is a part of the web series called Breakfast at Sulimay’s, where three senior citizens review new music, including metal. This episode had The Black Dahlia Murder (skip to 4:40 mark), and I gotta say, I found it funny, especially because of the slow introduction. That grandma’s facial expressions when the heavy part kicked in is also priceless. Apparently, she liked it, but not as much as she likes “Murdoch” (Marduk). The two guys weren’t as supportive, but hey, I’m only 25 and I can’t stand the new stuff like dancecore.

Grandma’s also down with da Bizkit, and you can watch their review of Shotgun after the jump (the review starts at the 5:07 mark).

Tesseract, hard at work

Right off the news of the recent vocalist switch, Tesseract are hard at work again. Here you can see a video of them in the studio, retracking the upcoming single “Eden.” The video doesn’t show Eliot, instead, you can see two dogs in the studio. God, they’re really pushing the envelope when it comes to experimenting on the new album.

According to a recent Facebook post, they’re also appearing in this month’s issue of “Classic Rock presents Prog” magazine. I’m not interested in the slightest, but hey, it’s got Pink Floyd on the cover, which means it’s good, right?

Greg and Max are pissed off

We’ve covered Greg Puciato’s and Max Cavalera’s collaboration project before, and now, we’re gonna do it again. Why? Because we can and you can’t do anything about it.

Anywho, recently the band was demoing new songs, and Max had the following to say about it to Roadrunner.com:

“Everybody ask me, ‘Hey Max, are you gonna do another Nailbomb?’ and the answer is always No, because we killed Nailbomb on purpose. So when Greg approached me with an idea of a project, I said I’ll do it, but it has to be like Nailbomb. I’m gonna share the vocals with Greg. We’re gonna have a bunch of killer guest musicians, and it’ll be the closest thing to a Nailbomb experience. I promise you it is going to be heavy as fuck, angry as fuck, and aggressive as fuck. Me and Greg are pissed off and we’re coming your way!!!!”

Wow, heavy, angry and aggressive. All three as fuck. I am sort of looking forward to this, unlike Max’s three past albums. Hopefully he let’s Greg write some of the lyrics along with letting him sing. Then again, we’re talking about a guy who has “KILL POSERS” written on his Twitter profile picture, which is angry alright… For a 13 year-old. Don’t get me wrong, I like the guy as a musician (and especially his stage presence, just look at that clip), but maybe Max manages to get the worst of him. Seems to be his biggest skill nowadays.

Beat it, John 5

John 5, the “awesome” guitarist that plays in not-so-awesome bands (ex-Marilyn Manson, Rob Zombie), has a new album coming out. No one knows exactly why, but he’s offering the first single for purchase on Amazon, and it’s a cover of Micheal Jackson’s hit Beat It.

You can hear a preview there, and while the song sounds decent, his announcement for the new album isn’t:

I have an album called ‘God Told Me To’ [coming out] and it’s half heavy and it’s half acoustic, which I’ve never done before. I’m doing a cover of Michael Jacksons’s ‘Beat It’, an instrumental version of it. And it’s gonna be amazing. I’m really excited about this record ’cause of the acoustic stuff, ’cause I’ve never done that before. And it’s gonne be awesome. I’m so excited for this to come out. I think I’m gonna put a [making-of] DVD out with it. People always like to see how I do things and stuff.

Usually when someone throws around words like awesome and amazing, it’s us, talking about this site. And that’s cool because we’re a bunch of assholes and we admit it. This guy is actually serious. You can see the cover for the single after the jump.

Tuesday Trivia: Metal connection #2 – Will Smith

Now this is a story
All about how Tuesday Trivia
Got twisted upside down
And I’d like to take a minute
Just sit right there
I’ll tell you how Dose of Metal started covering
Fresh Prince of Bel-Air

Yeah, my rap skillz are off the fucking hook… We are covering Will Smith for this week’s Tuesday Trivia, though. Fo’ real-real.