Get up and join the colony, bitches!

Nothing to get the day started like a new Napalm Death song, right? Make some coffee, crank up the volume, and make plans for tonight.

My plans are awesome, they consist of choosing one of several websites “girls” that will keep me company for tonight, if you catch my drift.

Bret Michaels got his ride on

Bret Michaels released a song and video for some crappy supercross show or something. I honestly haven’t paid attention, the only sport I watch is YouPorn.

Laugh at the vid above and troll all your friends with it, by posting it on their wall. Then mention Alex from Dose of Metal as the source for it. Then tell them you were about to do something, but then took an arrow to the knee. Then post some badly drawn troll face and tell them to press J over and over again.

If the paragraph above makes no sense to you, congratulations: You probably had sex at least once.

GNR’s DJ wrote 12 songs for ‘their new album’

Guns N’ Roses guitarist DJ Ashba (real name Disc Jockey Ashballs) says Axl played him hours of new material to him, and that in return, he wrote 12 songs that Axl loved.

That’s a cute story, want to hear everything? Well, Mama’s Fallen Angels interviewed him. You can check it out here:

When asked what it feels like to be in a GNR tribute band, DJ Ashba had no comment. He just showed his Slash-shaped dartboard.

Thursday Dose: This Is Turin

Writing for Dose of Metal gave me the opportunity to check out bands, I probably wouldn’t have heard of otherwise. Of all the great bands I got to check out, one stood out.

In May of last year, I reviewed Condate Records’ Split Roast sampler. The review didn’t go over well with some of the bands included on the sampler, but it never really bothered me what people thought about my writing. You just have to take it with a grain of salt, when a band, that you wrote negatively about, criticizes your work.

One band included on the Split Roast sampler was Colonel Blast. They got the best rating from me, with a 4-and-a-half skull rating for their two songs included. I really wanted to get their debut album next to review. I wrote to Condate Records, I wrote to their PR agency and I wrote to the band, to no success. It may be speculation on my part, but I felt like they didn’t want to cooperate with us, because of my negative reviews of some of their fellow bands.

Here is the catch, I’m a stubborn motherfucker. If you don’t give me your album for review purposes, I’ll just buy it and then review it. Obviously, as a reviewer for a metal blog, you can’t buy each and every album you want to review. You’d be broke within weeks. I bought Colonel Blast’s For The Greater Good anyhow and gave it a 5 skull review.

Following that review, the band apologized to me for not sending me their album and thanked me for the review. Maybe I was wrong, and the band simply overlooked my inquiry by mistake. To leave it all behind, I offered them an interview. I wanted to do a joint interview with their previous singer Matt Bolton and their current singer Darryl Jones. I never got an answer and was finally fed up with their unprofessionalism.

It’s pretty simple. I don’t have to write about your band. If I like your band, I’m writing about it to make other people, who read our site, check out your band. To me that’s a very positive thing. If I like your band, write positively about it and you simply don’t want to cooperate with me… well… fuck you. There’s not a better way to put it. If you don’t want the promotion, I won’t force it upon you.

More than half a year later, I find out about This Is Turin. This Is Turin is Darryl Jones’ original band, and guess what. I like them. So, even after the two dumps Colonel Blast took on us, I’m again swallowing my pride and going out of my way to write about their singer’s work. This time I’m not doing it because I think they deserve the promotion. I’m doing it because this is what Dose of Metal is designed to do; write about good music.

This Is Turin certainly do play great music and I’d like our readers to listen to them. After all, this should be about the appreciation of music, and not personal feelings towards their creators. I just want you, the readers, to understand that it wasn’t an easy decision for me to write about This Is Turin. But I want you to check them out either way. You can do that on Soundcloud or simply click the play button below. While you do that, I will keep on questioning my decision to write about them.

Anyone wanna listen to Derrick Green talk for 30 minutes?

That’s almost as long as Sepultura’s set at the Devil Side Festival, three years ago in my hometown. I’d rather listen to Green sing for 30 minutes but if this is your thing, go for it. First part above, second part after the jump.

Kind of related to the topic, how awesome is it when we use Youtube videos to start a post, instead of a dumb picture? It’s like a picture but it’s clickable. And it fucking moves! And it has sounds! Priceless. If you’ll excuse me, I’ll check if you can do the same with Youporn videos. Don’t expect me to post that though. I’ll be too busy for that.