Tag Archives: James Hetfield

James Hetfield interprets traffic

In a theory that could one day rival Freud himself, Metallica frontman and biker James Hetfield told some Japanese guy how he looks at traffic before a gig, and knows what to expect from the crowd based on what he sees there.

I could transcribe what he said and quote it here, but you’ll think I’m making it up. So see for yourself, after the jump.

Mini-review: James Hetfield signature picks

A while ago we told you that in order to play like James Hetfield, all you had to do was buy his signature picks. Not true, it seems, cause I just bought some and I couldn’t write “Master of Puppets 2” like I had originally anticipated. Bummer.

But, are they any good? Well, make the jump and find out.

Les Clayphreak

Les Claypool auditioned for Metallica in ’86, but didn’t get the gig (obviously). In an interview on “Behind The Music,” James Hetfield said the reason was that Les was too good and had to ‘do his own thing.’

But now, the mystery nobody gave a crap about has been solved in a recent interview. The real reason was… THEY THOUGHT HE WAS TEH FREAK!111

“I mean James said on VH1 Behind the Music that I was just too good, but ah, he and I were hanging out quite a bit during that time when they did the VH1 interview. And I said, ‘What the hell are you guys talking about, you didn’t want me, you thought I was a freak!’ And he just laughed.“ said Les while crying…

I mean, for fuck’s sake… Les Claypool? A freak? Nooooo way… No freaking way… Why would you say that? I mean, look at the photo above, does that look like a freak to you? Come on!!!  No… Just, no… Bullshit James, bullshit.

When asked what his reaction was back in ’86, Les answered “I know you are but what am I?”

Jason Newsted is safe

I always turn news into jokes, but I didn’t know how to spin this story, as I’ve always liked and respected Mr. Newsted… I wanted to make a joke about him working at KFC, but decided against it. In hindsight, I shouldn’t have posted it at all but it’s too late now as the backspace key is broken on my keyboard so fuck you, don’t judge me, you’re not my fucking mom. Jesus.

Anyway, Metallica frontman James “YEAAAH” Hetfield recently said in an interview that there’s no ‘ill will’ towards Jason, and that although their friendship isn’t exactly rekindled, at least they’re all at peace with each other. Awww, group hug.

“Last time we talked to Jason was at the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame. We’re not coming over for barbecues or anything, but, you know, we’re at peace and he’s at peace with his decision. And that’s good; there’s no ill will towards anything he’s done or he’s going to do at all.” said James while polishing his gun.

Full interview here.

Metallideth Charity

Half of The Big Four are doing some charity work. Not together, but at the same time, which is quite a coincidence.

Metallica are auctioning a one hour drum lessons and dinner with none other than Lars Ulrich. This will mean flying to their headquarters, getting a tour of the Metallica HQ,  etc… All proceeds go to the “Andre Agassi Foundation for Education, a not-for-profit public charity dedicated to transforming education to create opportunities for children.“ — More info here.

Megadeth are auctioning a Hartke bass amp, signed by the whole band, directly via eBay. All proceeds go to the American Cancer Society.— More info after the jump.

Now, we usually crack a joke or two about each news item we post. I could say that that taking drum lessons from Lars is like taking driving lessons from Stevie Wonder. Or ask if Megadeth is auctioning off a bass amp cause you can barely hear it anyway in most of their songs. But I’m not gonna do that.

Seriously though, charity is always a worthy cause so make sure you start bidding.